Rubbish joke thread

[al]

The wife came back from buying her costume for a fancy dress party earlier.

"Stay there baby", she said to me, "while I nip upstairs and put it on to show you."

She came back down, opened the living room door and stood before me.

"Wow love, that's a winning costume if ever I've seen one.", I told her, "That's the most convincing killer whale outfit I've ever seen."



"I'm a f****** nun''

 

[incorrigible]

I pointed to two old drunks across the bar from us and told my friend, "That'll be us in another 10 years."

He said, "That's a mirror, you dickhead."