Carlos Santana

[Takingabreak]

Dracula was walking down the street when suddenly loads of food started falling out of the sky on top of him, sandwiches, quiche, sausage rolls, chicken wings... so much that it killed him

Turns out it was Buffet the vampire slayer

 

[Gregag]

Earlier I was in b and q and there was an angry man shouting at the adhesives.


I think he was glue tin intolerant.

There's a man going mad with a mallet in millets

 

[wynne]

I was in my local Indian restaurant. When my food arrived it was incredibly offhand with me.
I'd mistakenly ordered the sag aloof.

 

[The History Man]

I was in my local Indian restaurant. When my food arrived it was incredibly offhand with me.
I'd mistakenly ordered the sag aloof.

Then the manager came over and said, excuse me sir, curry ok?”


I declined as I can’t sing and eat at the same time.

 

[The History Man]

Due to the awful weather conditions, l've just visited our 80 year old neighbour to ask if she needed anything from the shops...





Turns out she did, so l've given her my list too.. no point in both of us walking out on the icy pavements