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Did you hear about the cheese maker who painted his wife not once but twice?
He double glossed her.
Did you hear about the cheese maker who painted his wife not once but twice?
He double glossed her.
Carlos Santana
- Thread starter The History Man
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Paul McCartney was going to take part in this year's London marathon but after pulling a muscle he had to abandon the run.
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During the extremely cold weather at the beginning of the year, my pet hamster died. I was so attached to the rodent that I decided to have him preserved in formaldehyde. I placed him in a jam jar on my kitchen windowsill and with a tear, poured in the liquid, preserving him for posterity.
Sadly, i forgot to tell Mrs Hm about this and on finding the jar containing Eric, who had now decomposed to form a jelly-like substance, and thinking it to be a suitable accompaniment, placed it in the fridge, spreading Eric's remains on her toast the next morning. Finding it to be somewhat unpleasant, she emptied the jar in the garden before recycling it.
As the weather warmed and the seasons changed the spot in the garden where Eric had been deposited began to sprout previously unseen flowers. Flowers of such startling beauty that I picked them and placed them in a vase on the kitchen window sill. Eventually they wilted and were thrown away at which point Mrs Hm suggested i get some more.
In reply, I said...
"When it's spring again, i'll bring again, tulips from hamster jam."
They never stop you know..............
During the extremely cold weather at the beginning of the year, my pet hamster died. I was so attached to the rodent that I decided to have him preserved in formaldehyde. I placed him in a jam jar on my kitchen windowsill and with a tear, poured in the liquid, preserving him for posterity.
Sadly, i forgot to tell Mrs Hm about this and on finding the jar containing Eric, who had now decomposed to form a jelly-like substance, and thinking it to be a suitable accompaniment, placed it in the fridge, spreading Eric's remains on her toast the next morning. Finding it to be somewhat unpleasant, she emptied the jar in the garden before recycling it.
As the weather warmed and the seasons changed the spot in the garden where Eric had been deposited began to sprout previously unseen flowers. Flowers of such startling beauty that I picked them and placed them in a vase on the kitchen window sill. Eventually they wilted and were thrown away at which point Mrs Hm suggested i get some more.
In reply, I said...
"When it's spring again, i'll bring again, tulips from hamster jam."
They never stop you know..............
fiendish feet
Retro Guru
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Ti-guy":3mcphgv2 said:
Nice but needs crafting to really appall.
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Did you know that a candle flame smells just like burning nasal hair?
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How many crossdressers live near Manchester?
Well nearly 32000 have a Wigan address
How many crossdressers live near Manchester?
Well nearly 32000 have a Wigan address
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