What is your best answer to spam calls

[Awkward Kid]

If I'm with someone... Loud speaker....
'Can I ask you a question?'
Would you like to buy a phone?
I've a very good one for sale...
They normally hang up on you but sometimes you can get a good 20mins of them dodging you and vise versa. Works better if you add beer

 

[mikee]

Windows help center
Keep them on the line whilst I switch on the computer
Cos it's in the loft
Drag it on for a bit asking various dumb questions
Then when I get to the ip address bit a quote the time
Ooh it's not on the Internet son is the next answer


Or I just tell them to **** off

 

[Retro Cat]

http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=QRh1CMC3OVw

Seinfeld's always helpful

 

[grahame]

"Sorry, I can't talk at the moment. But if you give me your home number, I'll call you back later."

Which usually gets a response along the lines that "We do not take business calls at home, sir."

Which lets me use "So what makes you think I want to?"

Or they open with "This is a call about your computer..." To which I respond "I don't own a computer. Goodbye." I am, in this case, telling the truth. The computer belongs to work.

 

[Alison]

Re: try this

This is the best I have heard.
Turn the volume on, its hilarious.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mkdoogjic4I

Jamie

There are many great answers keep them coming

Alison

 

[drcarlos]

Last PC help place I started talking and taking in all the patter then said sorry someone was at the door and could they hold. I cam back to the phone after 20 minutes to apologise and they were still waiting, then 15 minutes later came back and they were still there so I hung up. they tried to call me back 3 times so I answered in French each time and they gave up. Funnily enough we don't get so many calls from that type of business now.

Carl.

 

[FMJ]

My stock response is "Let's cut to the chase. How much is it gonna cost per minute for you to talk dirty to me?"

 

[highlandsflyer]

F ing A!

I will be using that one, thanks!

 

[FairfaxPat]

Whenever I got a call from a newspaper or magazine subscription service, I got rid of them with two words------- I'm Blind....

 

[old_coyote_pedaller]

I quite like this guy's calm demeanour,

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=en ... aQd2zkuF8A