A lot of this is way to much for someone with no interest.
Basically, is it comfy, easy to park, cheap to fuel/charge, fit all me stuff in.
Cheap to service.
VW will always be worst off with faults as they dominate the sales market with Ford fuat behind them, then Audi (just more VW with added expense) in 3rd.
Then a jump to BMW/Toyota and Kia.
So if Kia are not getting a bad rep for niggles etc go Kia.
Honestly I quite like my Skoda, cheap for what you get, the 1.4 Petrol Octavia mk3 DSG is fast enough and nippy and get me 40-45 mpg on my easier commute from work and 30ish on my stop start crawl takes ages commute in to work (all of 4-10 miles depending on route).
Motorway/or longer country runs hit 50+mpg with a top box on.
It has loads of room for everything.
The in-laws Fabia's just work too and plod along (though this is not so comfy as it it a 1.4DSG vRS).
I was very surprised by the 1L Fabia we had to drive (a few years old) as the was nice to drive, much better than our 1L Peugeot thing. Gearbox was easy, was pretty nippy too.
Best car was still our old 1.6 Picasso as you didn't give a shit about it and could fit the word in it.
Shite to drive, like the Peugeot. Got leg ach from changing gears.
No idea on the SUVs as I wouldn't like them as a town car.