Worst/Funniest experiences buying used bikes?

I had a similar (positive?) experience to Greencat. I found a gem of a 92 Kona Fire Mountain on eBay with no bids due to a terrible description. It was covered in XTR, Chris king, hope and weirdly BMX bars/stem. I won it for something like £70, but it was located in central Manchester and I’m in Essex!
A night away with work in Brum and managed the journey to pick it up, which had been very difficult to arrange as the seller couldn’t give me a time/ location and even said they didn’t receive the money at one point. Loads of red flags and I half expected my bargain unicorn to be a scam.

In the end a pick up time was agreed but the seller wasn’t in, so left the lime green Kona in a shared hallway of a flat, where a yoga session was happening, I felt like a thief as I slung it over my shoulder and walked out. But I got it!

The worst thing was, 3 months later she emails to ask how the restoration is going…but since it was a mish-mash of BMX parts and high end bits on a heavy 14” frame. I’d stripped it and sold it all on… I didn’t have the heart to tell her!
 
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I saw a Colnago complete bike with Panasonic Isostar team colours on 2de hands website in Belgium . The bike was located near Eeklo the home of Roger De Vlaminck . The seller accepted my 250 euro offer and I made arrangements to travel to Belgium with an empty bike box . This involved a bus from the North of England to Victoria London then flix bus London -Dover -Calais -Brugge and a bus onwards to Eeklo.
One thing struck me the Colnago was of a certain age where it should have had a braze on front changer but looking at the photos it had a clip on front mech which made me think ,
The chap was out riding when I arrived so his wife answered and I handed over the money and proceeded to strip the bike down to fit in the box . The front mech got the better of my curiosity and I took it off not really needing to . When the front mech was removed the seat tube had a fair sized hole in it where the brazed on boss had snapped off . I wasn't best pleased so we said let's see what the seller says . When he returned he said it wasn't right and offered me the bike for 40 euro minus wheels . I accepted this offer that he had made and then he accused me of being a " business man".
I returned home with the Colnago and had Chris Marshall of Keighley braze on a triangular patch and new front mech boss for £40.00 . It is a real nice riding bike for a low tier Colnago .
 
Daftest thing I ever did was found with me cycling back with nearly an entire bike on my shoulders (arm thru the triangle style). The bike looked cool in photos, vintage 60s Campagnolo but it had been painted black. Only when I saw up close and the headbadge did I realise it was a Saxon Twin tube. It was 40 quid and I thought if anyone comes to see this they'll snap it up! I'd no car at the time and my dad was working nights, so I took the front wheel off, binned it (beyond repair) and set off for home, about 15 miles with my Saxon Twin tube balancing precarious all the way there! Did it though, got some funny looks but haha!
 
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