Always a trade off. Certain tooth combinations will also be less than ideal in the high end as you run things that weren't meant to go together. But yeah, friction is the ideal solution to compatibility issues. I also feel that for front shifting, friction is infinitely nicer than index.As thumbies were my preference even before experiencing this indexing quagmire it just makes sense and now I have good justification to use them!
Also good to get confirmation this is a common issue with more experienced tinkerers.