Things which were made of cheese. The nightmare recalled.

Almost anything made by Nukeproof.
Shimano chainrings post 1993, made worse by going to smaller ring sizes which increased wear rates.
Avid V-brakes losing the little return spring lug.
USE Alien seatpost - once you tighten it to stop the saddle moving, it's about 0.0000001Nm more before the allen bolt rounds or strips.
Several ultra-light seatclamps (can't remember who now) bolts snapped.
Token bottom bracket: splines very shallow, and cups trapped water inside the bearings.
Seconding the USE Alien. Bought because it was super-light but fitting/adjusting was a nightmare and the earlier version with two skinny bolts was too easy to strip. Replaced with a later version that had a beefier single bolt, only for the whole 'alien' top plug to come off mid-ride. And finding the post itself firmly fused into my steel frame (although that would be my fault for not checking/lubing it frequently).
 
Another grip was the Tioga Biogrip: http://www.bikepro.com/products/grips/tioga.html

No amount of hairspray could keep them in position; the really thin part would just keep stretching and stretching
until you ended up with an un-atomically shaped cork-screw. Happy days pre lock-on!

EDIT: Now with picture. Found on the BMX museum. Any self respecting MTBer would never have this colour of course....

1652912875378.png
 
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Seconding the USE Alien. Bought because it was super-light but fitting/adjusting was a nightmare and the earlier version with two skinny bolts was too easy to strip. Replaced with a later version that had a beefier single bolt, only for the whole 'alien' top plug to come off mid-ride. And finding the post itself firmly fused into my steel frame (although that would be my fault for not checking/lubing it frequently).

3rd. Had to dodge the falling cradle and saddle going into my front wheel on a road group ride. A brown chamois moment.
 
The USE Alien was renowned for failure. I think they learned from it; their products seem exceptional now.

I had a recent experience of a different UK company…

me ‘it broke’
them ‘do you have the receipt’
me ‘er….no’
them ‘well we can replace it with a charge….’
me ‘ok….do many of these break?..’
them ‘noooo …. We have had none back…’
me ‘ok’ rummage rummage ‘ah here’s the receipt’
them ‘ok take it to the retailer and they will replace it free of charge’
me ‘ok’

me ‘here’s this broken XX and here’s the receipt…’
retailer ‘not another one…we‘ve had every one we sold back…and we sold loads…it’s a nightmare’
me ‘ah….Can I have something else..’
retailer ‘yep…no problem…’
 
My biggest failure was my (and all friends) absolute lack of knowledge on how to fit grips, being teenagers we concluded something nice and slippery to get them on, so fairy liquid it was. This worked OK in the summer if you didn't use too much as it did dry out and go sticky, until it rained then they would start foaming up and spinning around the bars. Repeated often enough you would rain the fairy liquid out and eventually get a nice solid interface, in the meantime it was fun pretending to be on a motorbike twisting to go faster :D
 
Seem to remember some bolts for XT brake levers for the handle bar clamp were also toss.

Like 2mm of depth for the hex key to go in with no purchase whatever. Think I had specific ground flat hex keys for them.
I think the XT (or DX?) thumbshifter clamp bolts were also prone to threading...
 
I think the XT (or DX?) thumbshifter clamp bolts were also prone to threading...
Yeah….that was an issue of angle of dangle I think…ie remove the bolt completely and the bracket was sprung open, so without extreme care - and much squeezing of the clamp together - then it was incredibly easy to cross-thread the thing….

…grief what’s with the past tense? I could be messing with one next week ….
 
Specialized Future Shock front fork. The thing was an absolute noodle and I had no confidence braking hard into a turn. I made things better with a brodie rock rooster. When I got my next bike i insisted on a Bomber fork. So much better.
 

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