Carlos Santana

[bagpuss]

Bought some new stocks for the garden the other day
The missus fits in just fine

 

[The History Man]

What’s the difference between a hippo and a zippo?




One is very heavy and the other a little lighter.

 

[incorrigible]

Doing my part to recycle here:
https://www.retrobike.co.uk/threads/maintain-bike-with-deer-bits.274634/#post-2051211

 

[2manyoranges]

I heard Henning Wehn’s German Joke slot yesterday - two versions

How many Germans does it take to change a lightbulb?

ver1
One - it’s really a very simple procedure which simply involved twisting

Ver2
One - we are very efficient and do not have a sense of humour

 

[The History Man]

You can’t use ‘beef stew’ as a password.


It’s not stroganoff.

 

[bagpuss]

What's round and nasty.......a vicious circle

 

[incorrigible]

What's brown and sticky...........a stick

 

[bagpuss]

All good things come to those who wait? How fracking long do you have to.......

 

[The History Man]

My dog ran off in the park last night. I walked around for 30 minutes but could not find him. My wife said I should look harder...







So I shaved my head and got a tattoo.

 

[incorrigible]

My psychiatrist told me I was crazy, and I said I wanted a second opinion.
He said, "Okay, you're ugly, too."