'dont you sneer at me!' and other stories
- Thread starter legrandefromage
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doctorstewie
Senior Retro Guru
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This is nothing short of genius.
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Transient alloy passes him by
Grinding his knarl, trying to fly
Sneering and scraping and bouncing and pointing
As Monsieur LE cheese, his chainset anointing
Glides onward and upward with so little drama
On outdated steed gained almost for karma.
Grinding his knarl, trying to fly
Sneering and scraping and bouncing and pointing
As Monsieur LE cheese, his chainset anointing
Glides onward and upward with so little drama
On outdated steed gained almost for karma.
Uncle Grumpy
Devout Dirtbag
Your bike is fine, 27 and a half,
Another standard, I want to laugh,
2 x 10 or 1 x 11,
I'm out rocking 3 x 7
I know your mother, she isn't frigid,
I dated her when forks were rigid,
Take a trip down memory lane,
Zero travel, yet not much pain
It's not the bike, it's how you ride,
I'm ex-BMX, I know how to glide,
Silver beard and thinning hair,
Water bars and 2 feet of air
I got new bikes, thrills they inject,
But retro riding grounds my respect,
I rode it here and I'll ride it home,
My '96 Kona Lava Dome.
[Back story - I took my Lava Dome out yesterday on some single track near home. A group of guys on all the latest gear (and some sweet stuff too I might add) stopped me and, props to them, they loved the fact that I was out on a rigid 3x7 with canti brakes. They got a kick out of what I was riding and I dug the stuff they were on. And I was old enough to be their father...]
Grumps
Another standard, I want to laugh,
2 x 10 or 1 x 11,
I'm out rocking 3 x 7
I know your mother, she isn't frigid,
I dated her when forks were rigid,
Take a trip down memory lane,
Zero travel, yet not much pain
It's not the bike, it's how you ride,
I'm ex-BMX, I know how to glide,
Silver beard and thinning hair,
Water bars and 2 feet of air
I got new bikes, thrills they inject,
But retro riding grounds my respect,
I rode it here and I'll ride it home,
My '96 Kona Lava Dome.
[Back story - I took my Lava Dome out yesterday on some single track near home. A group of guys on all the latest gear (and some sweet stuff too I might add) stopped me and, props to them, they loved the fact that I was out on a rigid 3x7 with canti brakes. They got a kick out of what I was riding and I dug the stuff they were on. And I was old enough to be their father...]
Grumps
ultrazenith
Senior Retro Guru
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Brilliant poetry!
As we get going, here come the sneers,
You need a new bike, like mine! With one million gears,
Then a few km into the marathon, I pass the same guy,
And I whisper to myself, too faint for his ears,
A suggestion for something all his money cannot buy,
Improve the fitness of your cardiovascular system, instead of humiliating other riders for not investing thousands into unobtainium bicycle components,
And while you're at it, learn some trail skills,
Or at least move to one side when you dismount at the first sign of technical terrain features,
And furthermore, while you're doing that, **** off!
As we get going, here come the sneers,
You need a new bike, like mine! With one million gears,
Then a few km into the marathon, I pass the same guy,
And I whisper to myself, too faint for his ears,
A suggestion for something all his money cannot buy,
Improve the fitness of your cardiovascular system, instead of humiliating other riders for not investing thousands into unobtainium bicycle components,
And while you're at it, learn some trail skills,
Or at least move to one side when you dismount at the first sign of technical terrain features,
And furthermore, while you're doing that, **** off!
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